Mr Majeika on the Internet Page 4

  “My magic doesn’t work inside a computer,” said Mr Majeika glumly. “Does yours, Wilhelmina?”

  “You bet it does!” cackled Miss Worlock. “I’ll show you all – tee-hee! I’ll turn Hamish Bigmore, my star pupil, into a spider just like me.”

  “No you won’t!” screamed Hamish, and he began to run off down the passage. Wilhelmina waved her arms and muttered a spell, and Hamish turned not into a spider, but into a mouse like Gulliver. He ran up and down, squeaking angrily.

  “Just as I guessed, Wilhelmina,” said Mr Majeika. “Your magic may work inside the computer, but not properly. I bet you that all your spells go wrong.”

  “Nonsense,” shrieked Wilhelmina Worlock. “And just to prove it, I’ll turn you, Majeika, into a fly, and catch you in my spider’s web, and eat you up.” She waved her arms and muttered another spell. Mr Majeika did indeed turn into a large flying creature, but he wasn’t black like a fly, but covered with yellow stripes.

  “A wasp!” cried Jody. “That’s right, Mr Majeika, you attack her with your sting.”

  The spider and the wasp began to do battle. Mr Majeika kept diving at Wilhelmina, and threatening her with his sharp sting. But she kept jumping out of the way, and climbing up the walls of the passage with her spider legs. Then she began to tear down the walls themselves – huge, sticky spider webs, which she started to throw over Mr Majeika. Sure enough, he was soon trapped. The harder he struggled, the more he became caught

  up in the webs, which started to tighten around him like ropes.

  “Let’s chant Mungo the Modem’s rhyme at her,” said Pete. He and the others began to shout,

  “Incy wincy spider,

  You horrid old bug,

  You nasty broomstick-rider,

  I hate your ugly mug!

  I’ll squash your spider’s web flat,

  And throw it in the ditch,

  And smash your ugly black hat,

  You stupid old witch.”

  Miss Worlock became very angry at the rhyme, but she still went on tying up Mr Majeika with her webs.

  “We’ll save you, Mr Majeika,” shouted Thomas and Pete, but they couldn’t think what to do. Then they saw that, where the webs had been pulled down off the walls, there was a glowing light, and in a space behind the walls was a giant computer keyboard.

  “Gulliver,” called Jody to the mouse, who was trying to bite Miss Worlock’s legs, “you know all about computers. Isn’t there something we can do to escape?”

  But it was Mungo who answered.

  “There’s the ‘Escape’ button. If you press that, you can usually get out of a difficult situation on a computer.”

  “Quick then,” said Jody, “someone please find it and press it.” Gulliver ran over to the computer keyboard, and jumped across it to the top left-hand corner, where there was indeed a key marked “ESC”.

  “Hold on tight, everyone!” he called, and then he jumped on to the button. Everything suddenly started to spin

  round and round. Wilhelmina Worlock’s spider-clothes came off and she was just her usual ugly self. Mr Majeika stopped being a wasp and turned into several other creatures – including a tortoise, a small elephant and a polar bear – before becoming himself again. Hamish Bigmore turned back into his usual shape. The spider’s-web walls of the passage all collapsed, and Mungo the Modem was free at last – he ran off as fast as his legs could carry him. Wisps of the spider’s web were blowing around in the air, and Class Three were frightened that they’d get caught in them. But then they found themselves being tossed up in the air, and when they came down to the ground again they were back at St Barty’s School, in their own classroom.

  “Well, that was certainly an adventure,” said Mr Majeika. “And, thank goodness, we seem to have left Wilhelmina Worlock behind in computer-land. I can see now, Hamish Bigmore, that the whole thing was some trick that you dreamed up – I bet it was you who arranged for that huge computer to take over our classroom, and I’m sure it was Wilhelmina who sent it.”

  Hamish said nothing, but his guilty look showed everyone that Mr Majeika was right.

  “Where’s Gulliver?” said Jody. They looked around, but there was no sign of the mouse. Then they realized that the big new computer had vanished from the classroom, and the old one was back again, with its own mouse attached to it.

  “Who wants that stupid old machine?” grumbled Hamish.

  Mr Majeika switched it on, and when it had warmed up, to everyone’s delight, a familiar face was looking out at them from the screen. “It’s Gulliver!” said Pete. “He’s safe and unharmed – but he’s back in computer-land.”

  “I shouldn’t worry,” said Mr Majeika.

  “It’s more fun for you to be there, isn’t it, Gulliver? Out here in the ordinary world, you can only be a plastic mouse, but inside the computer you’re a real one, aren’t you?” Gulliver nodded.

  “I’ll tell you what,” Mr Majeika went

  on, “if Hamish doesn’t like being back at school, I’m sure I can magic him inside the computer again, and then Gulliver can take him back to the land of the Houyhnhmns, so he can spend all his time doing exams.” Hamish glared at Mr Majeika, but he said nothing.

  “I’ve had an idea, Mr Majeika,” said Thomas. “One of the things you can do on a computer is to minimise things, make them very small, and tuck them away in the corner of the screen while you’re doing something else. Why don’t you minimise Hamish for the rest of today? That should stop him being a nuisance.”

  “What a good idea, Thomas,” said Mr Majeika. “Hamish, if I hear one more grumble out of you this afternoon, I shall minimise you so that you’re very, very tiny. You see, I’m not too old-fashioned to learn from computers after all.”